Down Under Visits the North Country, Part 3

Stephanie McCarthy of South Australia is a splendid observer of human customs and foibles. We continue her observations of her journey this past summer with her husband Maurice in Canada. - Glenn N. Holliman

The Quality of Tea and Large Creatures, both Human and Other by Steph McCarthy

We Aussies could not find a decent tea or coffee anywhere. Maurice would order a ‘long black’, and out would appear a massive mug of brown-coloured hot water. I’d ask for a pot of Earl Grey tea, and I would be served a teapot the size of a smart car with one tea bag floating in lonely isolation inside. Both of us would sip sadly at our dishwater, and pine for our Australian bistros and cafes where quality is more important than quantity.

Below, Maurice and Steph in Canada

Talking of bulk, we witnessed a lot of obesity, not just in the old but in teenagers and twenty-something year olds, and we realised that while Australia has its fair share of fat and unfit youth, we have less people and therefore don’t tend to see it en masse, so to speak. We also wondered whether the Canadian winters provide some excuse. Motivation to exercise and diet must be low when it’s so icy and inhospitable outside the house.

As all Aussies know, Canadians drive on the wrong side of the road, even though it’s the right side, so we had told ourselves to be extra careful when stepping out to cross the road – we knew we’d tend to look first left, then right. Well, several times it happened, and in Australia it’s fair to say a similar mistake would have found us squashed on the tarmac. However, instead of hearing a screech of brakes and hurled insults, we noticed something quite wonderful – as soon as a Canadian driver spied us stepping out ahead, no matter how dumb our behaviour had been, the driver stopped and patiently waited until we’d reached the kerb on the opposite side.   

In our second week we accompanied my son and his wife to Jasper in a rented car with glass ceiling, perfect for viewing the Rockies from all angles. Every man and his dog were also headed that way. After all, it was glorious sunny weather and the Government had decreed that all entrance fees to national parks would be waived during this time of Canada’s 150th anniversary. 

But looking beyond the masses of tourists, we glimpsed black bear, elk, deer, and mountain sheep and goats, animals which we never thought we’d see up close in the wild. One creature we’d rather NOT have experienced were the mozzies, huge as helicopters, which descended upon us every time we tried to picnic in the perfect tranquil spot. We’d get settled by a rushing stream on a bank with wildflowers, the snow-capped mountains soaring above us, we’d open the picnic basket, and suddenly the buzzing hordes would attack.  

In Jasper we took a deep breath and joined the frenzied consumerism, actually enjoying one morning browsing the many souvenir shops to collect suitable gifts for our loved ones. Many of the logos and pix on T-shirts and tin signs could teach Australian tourism a thing or two. They were hilarious, mostly about humans versus bears e.g: a. a pic of a bear dragging a camping tent into the forest, and underneath the words ‘Canadian Takeout’ and b. a pic of three bears climbing all over a car full of terrified tourists, and underneath ‘Meals on Wheels’. Then there were the universally funny ones – ‘I’d have given up chocolate, but I’m not a quitter’.   

More next week of journeys in Canada by an Australian observer of life on this planet!